“Hey, where’s Eva’s candy dish?”
“Gone.”
“Oh. Where’s Eva?”
“Gone.”
“Gone gone?”
“Just the rest of the week. She’s having back problems.”
“Okay, she’ll be back, then?”
“Yes.”
“And there’ll be more candy?”
“Yes.”
“Good.”

Hands-down, the most gullible person I’ve ever known was my high-school friend Anne-Marie, who may be singlehandedly responsible for the boom in “ditzy blonde” jokes during the ’90s. We worked together at the grocery store near the school, and every day, she’d start work before me, and every day, I’d sneak up behind her and [...]