Things I shouldn’t have said #7

  • “You know what the only good thing is about allergy season? First, you eat something that gives you really loose stools. Then, when you have to take a big dump, you just sit on the can and wait for a big sneeze, and man, it does all the work for you.”
  • “You like soccer better than baseball just because the guys grab their crotches less? You know what sport you’d really love, then? The Paralympics.”
  • “What a horrible experience. You know those morning-after dumps where at the end you feel you’ve shat out your soul? I’m exhausted.”

One Response to “Things I shouldn’t have said #7”

  1. 1 Scott

    I KNOW THOSE DUMPS!!! It’s like there’s a hole left inside you and it doesn’t go away for a long time. And everything looks different when you come out of the bathroom.

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