They just suckle on it like a nipple


Guy #1: The only kind of puke that’s acceptable to get on you is baby puke. Same with baby poop. All they eat is apples and pears and shit.

Guy #2: Oh, hell no. Baby poop is nasty. I don’t know what’s being put in their mouths, b–

Me: My dick!

Guys #1 & #2: [horrified stares]

Me: [two full minutes of maniacal cackling]

3 Responses to “They just suckle on it like a nipple”

  1. Fun fact: infants who are not on solid food yet that only eat breast milk have sweet smelling stools.

    The other day I was burping my nephew and I said, “I smell donuts.” My sister said, “See? Sweet-smelling.”

    I was grossed out. But impressed.

  2. 2 Riley

    So, your dick resembles a nipple in some manner?

  3. 3 the other Peter

    You’ve gotta stop huffing the baby poop. Actually I was talking about it’s consistency. Nasty.

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