New research: Bill Cosby less attractive to women than history’s greatest monster


I don’t remember how this subject arose — I’m pretty sure I’m not the one who brought it up — but I was out to dinner with a few friends last night, and the girl sitting beside me made the surprising revelation that she would rather make out with Adolf Hitler than Bill Cosby.

This from a Jewish girl, too. I didn’t know what to make of it. When I pressed her, she shrugged and gave the following three reasons for her preference:

  1. “Hitler was kind of handsome at the beginning of the war.”
  2. “Power is sexy.”
  3. Bill Cosby is just … ew.”

I still just couldn’t comprehend this. I got the attention of another girl across the table, who hadn’t been listening to our conversation. “Would you rather make out with Bill Cosby or Hitler?” I asked.

She grimaced. “Hitler.”

So there you have it: Bill Cosby is less kissable than Adolf Hitler. I would have at least thought the toothbrush moustache would have been a turn-off, if not that whole “genocidal maniac” thing, but apparently not.

6 Responses to “New research: Bill Cosby less attractive to women than history’s greatest monster”

  1. I thought you were referring to Carlos Mencia.

  2. 2 Sher

    I’m going to go out on a blogging limb and say that never before in the history of the world has anyone used the names Bill Cosby and Hitler in a “who would you rather do” quiz.

    Which begs the question for men at the dinner table: Aileen Wuornos (Google her) or Hitler?

  3. (Note to my niece: Stop reading this now!)

    I pick Hitler, assuming that he has to be the bottom and that I’m allowed to make it as unpleasurable as possible for him. Also, I’m pretty sure that you could get a better reaction from your drinking buddies if you blurted out, “Dude! Guess who I fucked? Hitler!” They’d probably say, “Oh no! Dude!” and laugh. But if you’d said it was Aileen Wuornos, they’d probably just think she was that chubby Greek chick in your PSYC 100 class.

  4. 4 LoLo

    He is not more kissable. I’d go for Cosby. At least he’s kind of funny.

  5. He’s certainly funnier than Hitler. A psychological profile made by the OSS stated that although Hitler gave the impression of considerable wit, he seemed to lack any real sense of humour and couldn’t tolerate jokes at his expense, although he apparently was a skilled mimic. The architect of the Third Reich, Albert Speer, described Hitler’s sense of humour as almost entirely based upon schadenfreude and mean-spirited jokes at the expense of his officers. And according to the Führer’s personal valet, Heinz Linge, “Hitler had a weird sense of humour. He would laugh at Eva’s lipstick on a serviette and then say: ‘Soon we will have replacement lipstick made from dead bodies of soldiers’.” Not funny, Hitler.

    The New Yorker also shares some of Hitler’s favorite jokes here, crediting him with the invention of the “yo mama” joke. (Note: The historical veracity of this article is somewhat suspect.)

  6. 6 Kitty

    Pet: I think you need to make some new friends.
    Love, Shocked and Appalled from Kittysville.

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