Dern his hide

10Jul07

Jay’s wife Karla sent me a link to this article about actor Bruce Dern’s new memoir, along with the following note:

A) You should be offended (as should we all) that any sort of news organization thought a second rate “That Guy” writing a memoir was newsworthy. Especially one where he brags about never doing anything of interest (i.e., drinking, smoking, drinking COFFEE, or smoking “a marijuana cigarette.”)

B) He titled it “”Things I’ve Said, But Probably Shouldn’t Have.” Which as we all know, is a clumsily worded rip-off of the famous Peter Lynn bit.

C) Dude didn’t even write it. He was just interviewed for a couple of hours by a couple of hacks.

Just sayin’.

Thanks, Bruce Dern. Thanks a lot for stealing the title of my future memoir. That said, I would like to find out what terrible things you must have said about your daughter Laura’s ex-fiancĂ© Billy Bob Thornton when he flew to Las Vegas with Angelina Jolie for a quickie wedding, leaving poor Laura to find out she’d been dumped by reading about it in the newspaper. If there’s a chapter of your book solely dedicated to just ranting, cursing, and hurling death threats at that skinny hillbilly, that would justify the cover price.

* * *

By the way, speaking of so-called famous Peter Lynn bits, Brain-Damaged Toula locked herself out of the house with an armload of groceries tonight. I considered not letting her in purely on the basis that I overheard her repeatedly referring to multi-platinum Canadian recording artist Jann Arden as “Jane Arden” the other day, even though I’m 99 percent positive she was staring at the cover of her Jann Arden CD while she was doing so.



One Response to “Dern his hide”


  1. 1 BLACK CONVICTED « Man vs. Clown!

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