Things I shouldn’t have said #34

  • “Okay, hypothetically, if a few years ago, when you passed out drunk, I dangled my junk in your mouth but it didn’t actually touch the sides, we’re both still straight, right?”
  • “You know who the best Asian hockey player of all time is? Alex Mogilny. Yes, he is. He’s from the Russian Far East. He’s Asian. He’s just not all ching chong, wing wong.”
  • “I just took a dump so huge and epic that it deserves to be at the centre of its own world-creation myth.”

6 Responses to “Things I shouldn’t have said #34”

  1. 1 Suzie hearts Toronto

    I laughed at the first two, but I object to having been the other person in the conversation for the third. Is this what the world has come to? Epic dumps being mentioned in mixed company?

  2. It’s not often that a person is fortunate enough to be in attendance for the origin of the next great creation-myth. Now, you must carry with you what you have witnessed, and go forth into the world to spread the good news.


  3. Furthermore, I’m not sure why I hyphenated “creation myth”.

  4. 4 Scott

    Congratulations on the dump and know that chronicling it is exactly the right thing to do.

  5. I think if the intention to dangle your junk in someone’s sleeping mouth is there, then that makes you just a tiny bit gay. Not much, though. Maybe 4%, at a push. On the bright side, this means you can now be someone’s GBF!

  6. 6 settlesdown

    Gives new meaning to the term Holy Shit. I love reading your blog. Good shit man.

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